July 2021

He finally got married too. To her obviously.

Not gonna lie, I stalked a bit his page once I found out. Its strange seeing him like that, which considering that I will celebrate my 3 year wedding anniversary and have a 9 month old baby, I truly shouldn’t find it strange.

Life.. is funny.

Wish them the best, what can I say..

May 2021

Seven months of being a mom. Seven months of sharing myself with another human being that I made.

Crazy how the time flies.

I’m good now though. No more happy pills, no more dark thoughts. Just trying to enjoy these last few months before she becomes a toddler.

Uh look at that..

You know, it took me like a month and a bit to realise that I’ve given my daughter the same name as B. fiancée. 🤷

To be honest, it is a classical old name which is easy to pronounce across all languages, along with also being her godmother’s name.

We also literally chose it before going in for my c section and it wasn’t on the list at all. Like not even a whisper of it.. And I truly didn’t even realised till weeks after which made me giggle.

Guess this means I don’t give a fuck anymore? Considering that it didn’t even cross my mind?

I’ll take that.

However a small part of me wonders what the fuck he will think if he finds out. :)))

Tu de ce scrii?

Am dat de aceasta întrebare într un post pe blogul ‘a sophisticated woman’ ( how the heck do you link stuff anymore when writing on your phone? 2nd edit, uh, managed to figure it out) și trebuie să recunosc că m-a pus un pic pe gânduri.

Multă vreme nu am mai scris pentru ca eram fericita sau pe acolo. Nu aveam motive, pana la urma acest blog a început ca un mod de a abera despre B. și lucrurile random din timpul facultății.

Acum când daily grind a fost munca, casă, munca și o vacanță, doua, nu prea am avut despre ce. I mean, stilul meu de a scrie e atat de plictisitor.. Literalmente aberez despre ce m-a afectat cel mai mult.

Nu mai am povesti nebune despre sex, sau drame despre foști / facultate. Sarcina m-a afectat emotional și fizic de am simțit nevoia sa scriu iar, hence the last few posts dar in rest.. As putea sa aberez despre cum nu cădem de acord sa decoram sufrageria :)))? yeah right, as if that’s exciting as fuck.

Nu știu, ce e drept zilele astea nu funcționez cum trebuie. Lipsa somnului (deh, copil de 7 săptămâni), combinat cu alt lockdown și hormonii mei care încă sunt peste tot, m-au adus în stadiul în care sunt mai mult sau mai puțin un cartof în pat care are grija de copil.

Although it may be a bit of a post natal depression… yeeey. -_- so watch out, I may write more often now.

Monday 2nd of November

My potato is home.

Has been home for a bit now, spending only two weeks in NICU which was less than what we expected but she definitely surprised us considering she was born at 33 weeks.

It was interesting the first few days especially as we are two people that have no clue about babies / children in general.

I was a sight to see the 1st night she was home as I panicked a few times while husband was sound asleep. Was she was breathing or not? ( no machine to look as used to do in the hospital), was she cold or hot ( googling at 4 am about infant cold hands and feet/ body heat) and so on.

Oh, let’s not forget the 1st time she had milk coming out of her nose. I literally froze till common sense kicked.. Gotta admit, husband is better at this kind of stuff than I.

So yeah.. we are slowly getting used to our potato and being called mum and dad.

Who knew that I will actually end up married and have a kid in the end. Ten years ago this wasn’t the plan..

Oh, and recovery after a c section can be a right bitch. The ones that say that a c section is the easy way out and makes me less of a mum can go and suck on a lemon. Or a dick.

Sunday 27th of September

A few days ago I started a post in which I was moaning about how I still hate pregnancy.

Now?.. I wish I still was pregnant.

My baby girl decided to be be naughty and after two days of monitoring, the doctors took the decision to do an emergency c-section.

I can’t even fully put into words the last few days… We are running on fumes and I hate that I can’t move and do more while she’s away in a different town as that particular hospital has better facilities.

I’ve gone to see her today the 1st time since giving birth, and damn it was tough. So small and so many wires and tubes around her that I was even scared to touch her.

I sincerely don’t wish this on anyone.

She’s doing great so far and hopefully in three weeks she will be home with us. But till then, this mama needs all the positive energy she can get.